What is ‘Victim Mentality’ And How to Break Out of It?

“There are no victims only volunteers”, my mentor said to me.

I can see how that works.

Do you tell yourself you can’t before you even have tried?

Are you hiding your true potential because you are too frightened to fail?

Are you stuck in the past or going round in circles blaming everyone and everything about bad things happening in your life?

Are you unbeknown to you sabotaging your experiences with never-ending thoughts that dominate your mind without any factuality of them coming true?

You are caught up in the so-called victim mentality syndrome that does not befit your worth but instead is hindering your potential to live your life to the fullest.

How the victim mentality is holding you back

The person with a victim mentality will always find an excuse for not making a change. In their mind, other people (very often even their family and friends) are “out to get them” or are purposefully trying to harm them.

Placing value on yourself adds credits to your life and to your life expectancy by expanding and creating experiences. This can however happen only when you become a responsible and mature individual who’s capable to live your life independently whilst developing a deeper self-awareness which allows us to be critical of ourselves.

The victim mentality approach stunts your growth by placing blame for your downfalls on other people or circumstances. It literally keeps you stuck in a perpetuating cycle of negativity that disallows you to move into your rightful place. It dampens your spirit, takes away your light and inhibits you from moving into new chapters of your life.

How to break out of the victim mentality

I want you to consider a shift in your thought process. A new perspective on how you can respond to bad things happening to you - not by taking the blame but by consciously taking the responsibility for your actions and changing HOW YOU THINK AND RESPOND to what happens to you.

Practice is key and you may have to make an effort here for yourself - it will not happen overnight but eventually, you’ll realise that you can live your life differently. You may have to go through the pain of facing the truth and letting go of the past as well as any destructive habits and patterns of behaviour that thus far have kept you in your ‘safe negative space’.

You will have to make a daily balance sheet to realise what thoughts you can and should allow to take up space in your mind, and what negative attitude should be vacated and disallowed.

Thoughts are to your mind and soul what food is to our bodies.

In order to heal you should choose nutritious, natural and healthy products and it’s the same for your mind - your spiritual side also needs ‘vitamins’ in the form of positive thoughts otherwise you can run into the risk of wearing yourself down mentally, and physically. To truly love yourself you must proactively work on removing all the toxic thinking and behaviour that’s been holding you back.

Your mental mindset is the most important aspect of your health. The roots you put down will surely grow into the life that you carve out for yourself - one that can be full of anticipation, excitement, experience and happiness.

A life where you develop a strong and resilient mind that helps you build self-belief and self-awareness - all of which lead to true happiness. Learn what motivates you, accept your imperfections and keep yourself accountable for your actions or the lack thereof.

Be honest with yourself without sounding judgemental - we live to learn from our mistakes. Even better if we learn from the mistakes of others or share our wisdom to help them instead of allowing for the negativity to spread.

“My life”, “myself” - but is it really yours and are you really your own person if you constantly let others write your story for you by avoiding taking the responsibility?

Be your own hero. Write your own book. Live YOUR life.